Happy Halloween - I Hope

So far this Halloween is not turning out so great. It started off well enough yesterday morning but has been on a steady downhill slide since then. Yesterday morning I made a grocery store run and then planned on finishing up the last minute details for today. Island Girl wanted a Jedi costume from Star Wars and since I own a sewing machine and I watch Project Runway I just knew I'd be able to make her one. Wrong. Knowing how to use the sewing machine and knowing how to create a pattern in my head and then turn it into a sewn piece of material are really two different things LOL I've always wanted to learn to sew and I thought this would be a good time to start. I wanted to get started on this several days ago but since we've all been sick I just felt too bad to get started. I woke up yesterday feeling better and after I got home from the grocery store I was ready to start sewing. Until I laid the material out on the living room floor and realized that I didn't understand the pattern. I messed around with it for a while until I realized that it just wasn't going to to happen. Do you remember the commercials for Holiday Inn Express where a man is on a train and the conductor is worried about crossing a bridge and the Holiday Inn guy starts telling him about weight and the velocity of the train and the conductor asks if he's an engineer and the guy says "No but I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night"? Well that's exactly how I felt about making this costume - I love Project Runway so I must be able to create a costume right? Nope - it doesn't work that way LOL So I tell a very disappointed Island Girl that she needs to come up with an alternate costume. The Island King hears us and informs us that he can make the costume. Sure you can honey. He doesn't say anything else about it and I continue on with my day. I got the house clean since my inlaws will be descending on us tonight and I baked a cake for the kids to decorate and I'm feeling like everything is under control. I should have known better. A while later my neighbor knocks on my door to tell me that my sons have taken off pieces of her fence and she wants them put back. I go out to the back yard and sure enough they've taken about 4 boards off of her fence. I ask what's going on and they tell me they needed boards for a fort they're building. We own two of the fences that enclose our backyard and they take the boards off of the one fence we don't own. And what kid actually takes a crowbar to a fence to gather wood? Mine does. I yell at them to put the boards back and to go apologize to the neighbor for tearing up her fence.
After supper it was time to carve pumpkins. The kids had a lot of fun but it took much longer than I expected and of course made a huge mess. We finally finished and I got the Island Boys to bed about 10:00. As I'm cleaning up the mess the Island King comes in and tells the Island Girl that he's ready to make her costume. He tells me that he can cut out the pattern but he doesn't know how to use the sewing machine so I'll need to sew it together. Great. It's late and I'm ready for a shower and bed but now I find out I'll be sewing instead. I must say that I am really impressed. The Island King took the pattern, measured the Island Girl and actually cut out a Jedi robe with sleeves. He pinned it all together and I set up the sewing machine to sew the pieces together. I sewed the arms together and then sewed the two back panels together and we opened it up to find out that it had been pinned wrong and I've sewn the seams on the outside LOL Despite being sewn inside out it actually looks pretty good. Then he tells me that now he has to make a hood and then a tunic to go under the robe. What?! It's 12:30 and I HAVE to go to bed - very soon! He gets the rest cut out and I tell him that I will sew the rest together tomorrow morning. Island Girl is riding the bus home with a friend who is having a Halloween party so she needs the costume when she leaves for school. That's just not happening so I tell her that I will finish the costume and then bring it to her at school sometime during the day. Of course this new plan screws up my plans for the day but it's better than being up all night. So the Island King drapes the robe over the back of the dining room chair and we go to bed. This morning I came down the hall and the smell of cat pee just about knocked me over. AAAGGHHH!!! I know the cat is old but I've had to rip out the carpet in the Island Boy's room and get rid of every throw rug I have in the past two weeks because of that cat. And this morning? You guessed it - he peed all over the bottom of the costume. I swear I thought I was going to have a stroke. I throw the costume out the back door in disgust and head for the coffee pot. I'll need coffee to figure this out. I get my coffee and go out into the office for a few minutes of peace before this day gets started. Since the cat is not doing well we've been giving him a paste like food the vet gave us. And apparently the dog ate it instead because there, all over the office floor is dog vomit. This is the only floor in the house that the cat hasn't ruined and now it's got dog puke all over it. Yeah, I really have time to clean the carpet today. I gulp down my coffee and realize that now I'm running late. Into the Island Boy's room I go to get them up and ready for school and their room is trashed. It was clean at bedtime but I guess they decided to have a party last night after they were put to bed because toys were scattered everywhere and there were toasted pumpkin seeds and juice packs all over the floor. What the #$$%? They aren't supposed to have any food or drinks in their room and it looks like they had a frat party in there last night. The Island Girl gets up and has a complete meltdown when I tell her about her costume. I wake up the Island King and tell him and he just covered his head with the blanket and went right back to sleep. Thanks for the support honey LOL I tell the Island Girl that I'm taking the Youngest Island Boy to school and that I'll be right back to figure out what to do about her costume before her bus comes. The Youngest Island Boy and I pile into the car and stop by my SIL's house to get my niece. I love my niece to pieces but that child is slower than molasses and she was even slower this morning. I was watching her mosey through the yard towards the car and I couldn't take it any more so I rolled down the window and practically yelled at the poor kid to hurry up. My SIL gave me a funny look (a why are you yelling at my kid look) and I told her that I had to get back before the Island Girl's bus came. Of course my niece acted like her feelings were hurt so I spent the ride to school apologizing. What a great aunt I am. I've yelled at a six year old on Halloween morning for walking too slow. I drop them off and make it home before the bus comes and tell the Island Girl that I just don't know what we're going to do but that she needs to take her back up costume with her in case we don't get the Jedi one finished. And off she goes in tears too. Great. I have to make a pot of chili for dinner tonight and I have to make finger sandwiches to take to the party in the Youngest Island Boy's classroom today and I have to clean dog puke off the office floor. I tell the Oldest Island Boy that homeschool has been cancelled for today and to get his bottom into his room and clean up the mess they made last night. Which made him mad because he has to clean up the mess all by himself even though his brother helped make the mess. Too bad. And I want to throw the cat into the Bay. And I want to throw the dog in after the cat.
So here I sit, and instead of doing the things I need to do I'm drinking coffee and venting on my blog. I actually love Halloween and we always have a lof of fun but right now I'm thinking I should add rum to my coffee, get snot slinging drunk and then sleep til tomorrow LOL I can just hear the kids talking now - "Do you remember the year mom got drunk and slept through Halloween?" LOL Since that's not a conversation I ever want to hear I guess I'll get moving. I would love to say that things can't get worse but I learned a long time ago that things can ALWAYS get worse and to never say that LOL Instead I'm going to say a prayer, clear my head and muddle on through this day. What gets done will get done and what doesn't get done just won't. Wish me luck!