It Was NOT A Blonde Moment

The other day while my mom was over, she, the kids and I went to Walmart.

When we got to Walmart I pulled in to Murphys to get gas. I filled the tank and then got back in the van.

And it wouldn't crank.

I put it in Neutral and then back into Park and tried again. Wouldn't crank.

This has never happened before and I wasn't sure what to think.

I'd turn the key and the engine would just start to turn over and then it would die.

The lights inside were working and it drove fine on our way there but now it wouldn't crank?

Since the lights were working I knew the battery had some power but obviously not enough to actually crank the car.

And because I've had too many starters to count go out in my life I knew it wasn't the starter. A dead starter makes a distinctive clicking sound and that wasn't happening.

But how does a battery just die like that? Seems like it would have acted funny when I cranked it at home just a few minutes before.

So there we sat. There was a line at every pump and I knew I needed to get the van out of the way so Mom and I got out and pushed the van over into the Walmart parking lot.

And not one person offered to help.

What the hell? There were men everywhere but not one offered to help us push.

We get the van over into the parking lot and decide that we need a jump.

I walked back over to Murphys and ask the FIVE men standing in the line. And not one of them had jumper cables.

And Mom and I didn't have a cell phone with us.

So we gathered the kids and trekked across the giant Walmart parking lot in search of a phone.

They actually have a pay phone in Walmart - which was a surprise since pay phones seem to be a thing of the past - and I called the Island King.

But he was asleep and didn't hear the phone. So I called his brother who lives 3 houses down from us.

And I had to explain what had happened and that I wanted him to go wake up the Island King.

Being a man, he had to know all of the details, so I told him what the van was doing and that I probably needed a jump.

"Did you pop the hood?" he asks.

Pop the hood? Unless there's a flashing arrow under there pointing at whatever's wrong there really isn't any point in me popping the hood LOL

We wait and a few minutes later the Island King pulls up, gets in the van and turns the key.


I was shaking my head and telling him how it acted at the gas pump and that I just didn't understand why it cranked now.

"Maybe you didn't turn the key right" he says.


"I know how to turn the key, jackass!" I yell at him.

He looked at me, smirked and said that it wasn't nice to call a man who'd come to my rescue a jackass.

The van has cranked fine since then so I have no idea what happened but I can tell you for sure that the next time it won't crank - I'm calling a woman.

And NO I wasn't having a "blonde moment"!