I Don't Think the FBI is Really Coming

A few days ago I got an email from Robert Mueller, director of the FBI.

The email states that I am being investigated for money laundering and terrorist activities. It threatens several times that I am going to be arrested within the next seven days.

But... if I'll just send $360 to some woman in Nigeria, I'll get a securities coupon and then I won't be arrested.

Isn't that fascinating? You can launder money and participate in terrorist activities and if you buy a $360 coupon from Nigeria all charges will be dropped.

I was reading this email to the Island King and didn't realize the Youngest Island Boy was listening so intently.

As soon as I finished reading he got really upset, telling me to pay the $360 so I wouldn't have to go to prison. He was particularly freaked out by the thought of the FBI showing up at our door.

I explained to him that the email was a scam, that I wasn't laundering money or involved in terrorist activities and that if the FBI were going to arrest me they wouldn't send me an email telling me to buy a Get Out of Jail Free card.

And I thought he understood.

But then yesterday my SIL stopped by to tell me that she overheard some of the moms talking at the bus stop about the fact that I'm being investigated by the FBI.


I asked the Youngest what he'd been telling the neighborhood kids and he says he told them all about the email.

"Did you tell them that the email was a scam and that the FBI isn't coming to arrest me?" I asked.

"Well, no. When I told them about the email they all thought it was cool that the FBI is coming to our house so I didn't tell them that it's just a scam."

So now the neighbors think the FBI is investigating me.

I can't imagine what the people around here will talk about if we ever move.