The Miracle of Toilet Paper

My Dad sent me this...

The Miracle of Toilet Paper
Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. 

Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a

"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of
toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds." 

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the
mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.

"How long will this take?" I ask.

"They will grow larger over a period of years," my husband replies. 

I stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between
my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"

Without missing a beat he says, 

"Worked for your butt didn't it?"

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy he may even walk
again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a

Stupid, stupid man.