Stepping into the I age

We aren't exactly technology savvy and until the other day we've been using 1st generation Android phones.

They work fine for phone calls and texting but trying to run an app or get on the internet is a lot like the old internet dial up days. And they do drop a lot of calls.

A few days ago the Island King was on his phone and the phone dropped the call – yet again.

I'm not sure what happened next but the man snapped, grabbed a hammer and beat his phone to a pulp.

He's been saying for a while now that he needed a new phone but that all he wanted was something reliable for calls and texts. Which is why I was shocked when he came back from the store with a new Iphone.

That's a lot more than just a calling, texting kind of phone – which he soon found out.

Bless his heart. The man could barely figure out how to dial a number on it so off he went to his brother's house to get “I” schooled.

He came back home all excited about everything his phone would do and about this computer/woman who lived in his phone and would do whatever he told her to do.

You should know that he's always wanted to be married to Cherry 2000 or a Stepford Wife but he got me instead so this new Stepford computer/woman thing made him really happy.

Her name is Siri and he was over the top excited about her.

Yes, I know that everyone knows about Siri but he's a little behind the times.

So he tells me to watch this and he holds up his phone and tells Siri to send me a text message saying I love you.

Well, Miss Siri says “That's sweet but it's just not meant to be.”

What? Not only did she say that but she didn't send the text to my phone either.

We called the Island Girl in and she tells us that Siri has all kinds of stuff to say but she doesn't understand why the text message didn't come through.

Right about then the Island King gets a text from his brother saying “I love you too sweet cheeks”

Bwaaahhaaaa. Siri sent his I love you text to my BIL.

The Island Girl is laughing and telling us that we are dinosaurs and shouldn't have access to modern technology.

Why is it that if you lived before 300 tv channels and your remote was called a clicker, people automatically assume you're a dinosaur?

He still hasn't figured much out about his phone but he told me he won't be sending any I love you texts until he's sure they'll come to me and not a client or his brother.

He checked his email on the phone yesterday but then deleted it, thinking it would be on his computer at home but when he deleted the messages it wiped them off the server so he can't see them again.

I'm almost positive that it won't be long before he disables almost everything on the phone except Siri – I think he likes her.